Somewhere in the middle of the COVID years, I shrank.

Not all at once. It happened gradually. I built some strong virtual relationships during the lockdown, so when things opened back up, I stuck with that way of doing things. I turned down trips and offered Zoom instead. I skipped conferences, coffees, and lunches — declining invitations I would have said yes to without thinking in the before times. I told myself it was being careful, saving time. It felt reasonable.

But with that “safety,” my world got smaller, and a smaller world felt scarier. Which made me want to pull back more. Which made the world smaller still.

I was in a loop, and I didn’t recognize it for what it was — fear compounding on itself until it had reshaped my whole operating mode. I had become someone who avoided friction, avoided exposure, and avoided risk. I was choosing to play small.

I didn’t change because the fog cleared. I changed because I stopped waiting for it to.

What happened when I showed up

Late last year, I started traveling more. This year, I shifted to an in-person bias — saying yes to things I’d been quietly declining. And something happened: bigger deals started showing up. Better conversations. Stronger relationships.

Here’s why I think that’s not coincidental. Trust is built faster and deeper in person. And trust isn’t just a nice-to-have — it’s how you manage risk when the environment is uncertain. The leaders I know who are navigating this moment well aren’t the ones with the best information. They’re the ones with the best relationships — more eyes helping them see through the fog, more people willing to make a call and back each other up.

When you pull back from the world to protect yourself, you don’t reduce your risk. You just cut off access to the thing that helps you navigate it.

What I do when the doomscroll calls

Now, when I’m tempted to scroll through the newsfeed and grouse about how terrible everything is, I use that as a trigger to reach out to someone instead. Make a phone call. Connect to a real person. It almost always gives me more hope — and a more expansive view of what’s possible — than anything I’d find in the feed.

What did COVID do to your risk appetite? Now that we know the fog isn’t clearing, how are you adjusting your leadership?

If you want to dig deeper…

I talked through all of this on a recent episode of Damns Given with Nick Richtsmeier. Nick was a coaching client for a stretch, and when we get together, we tend not to stay safe for long. We went deep on how leaders navigate uncertainty right now — and what’s actually broken at the top of most organizations. Watch it here.